Silly Oklahoma Laws

A friend (who shall remain nameless, but rhymes with Meli Mellman) posted a link to a list of “crazy” Oklahoma Laws. I wondered if they were still in effect, but sadly a quick search was unable to find any of the laws mentioned. However, there are plenty of silly, crazy or outright unconstitutional laws still on the books, showing that it isn’t just our current state legislature that is batshit crazy.

Take for instance 21 O.S. 371: “Any person or persons, corporation or company, who shall use the flag or the coat of arms of the United States, or any pattern, imitation or representation thereof, either by printing thereon, or attaching thereto, any advertisement or device for the purpose of gain or profit, or as a trademark or label, shall be guilty of misdemeanor.”

Oops. Who gets to arrest her?

How about Oklahoma’s version of the “swear jar” in 21 O.S. 905: “Every person guilty of profane swearing is punishable by a fine of One Dollar ($1.00) for each offense.” I’d be broke by sundown.

21 O.S. 1161.1(A)(2): A. It is unlawful for any person to knowingly and willfully desecrate a human corpse for any purpose of….2) 2. Camouflaging the death of human being

Good thing these guys didn’t come to Oklahoma.

21 O.S. 1281 tells us it is a crime to possess a SLUNGshot…but a SLINGshot is usually OK. Who knew?

My daughter will be upset with hearing about 21 O.S. 399: “Whoever…promises any gift….to any player…in connection with the conducting of any amateur athletic contest with the intent to influence the action…shall be deemed guilty of bribery.”  Guess no ice cream for her when she scores a goal anymore 🙁

Cheating on your spouse is a felony (21 O.S. 871) that can get you 5 years in prison.

And finally, you better think twice about smooshing a spider. 21 O.S. 1685 makes killing an animal a felony.